![]() In the corner, miniature gold statues and plastic flowers surrounded the perimeter of a hot tub. A waterbed with a purple satin comforter and a mirrored headboard and ceiling took up nearly half the room. It was an ugly subject, triggering the word “misogyny” to roll off my tongue.īut that all changed the night my boyfriend and I checked in to the honeymoon suite at a local dive motel. Back then, I knew all I wanted to know about pornography. There, I felt as if I were at the heart of feminism - especially when I would pass Gloria Steinem in the hall on my way to the Xerox machine or the toilet. Afterward, I spent time as an intern at Ms. That’s why if years ago someone had told me I would one day covet my own stash, I’d have said “Fat chance.” In college, I’d studied feminist criticism. Sure, porn featured women, but its use was exclusive to men. Frappo, the neighbor across the street, housed his impressive collection of girlie magazines in an old copper urn besides his brown vinyl recliner. ![]() Andy, my best friend’s older brother, crammed his glossy pink centerfolds beneath the weight of his bed mattress. No wonder he was always working on his car. My uncle kept a heaping pile of it in a tool cabinet at the back of his garage. Most of the people I know who used pornography are men. It seemed pornography and men were made for each other, like jock straps and testicles, or Monday-night football and beer. After all, who exactly benefits from the ubiquitous money shot? I once thought that women had only one of two kinds of relationships with porn: Either they parted their legs and posed for it, or clenched their fists and raged against it. It never occurred to me that women might find pornography appealing. They just don’t discuss it as much … until now. Contrary to popular perception, many women enjoy porn as much as men do.
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